My sister and I were very close growing up and stayed that way after I got married – until I caught her and my husband in bed together. I haven’t spoken to her since then and my husband and I got divorced.
Ever since then my mother has been after me to forgive her and forget what happened, but I just can’t. She ruined my marriage!
Queenie, is my mother right?—Still angry
Dear Still angry,
If your husband had not cheated on you with your sister, it probably would have been (or was!) with some other woman. You have every right to be angry with your sister, but holding a grudge tends to be self-destructive.
Try to forgive your sister and at least be on civil terms with her. Forgetting is another matter, but try not to dwell on the memory.