Dear Queenie,

Our mother had a room filled with keepsakes from our childhood that she was saving for my sister and me. Soon after she died our father emptied out the room and just threw everything away. Now all our memories are gone.

Queenie, how could he be so mean?—Devastated daughter

Dear Daughter,

My answer depends on several factors: Did your father know you wanted to keep these things? And, were you and your sister ready to remove them from his home?

Your father may have wanted to get rid of painful reminders of the loss of his beloved wife. Or, he may have always been annoyed by what he considered her hoarding of useless junk and just wanted to clean house. Either way, if your father did not know you wanted all these things or if he knew, but wanted to get rid of them and you were not ready to take them out of his home, you could not expect him to keep them for you indefinitely.

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